i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
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