if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
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