i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I had to cum in my sink.
Randomize
