I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
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