Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
