when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
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