She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
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