we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
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