He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Randomize
