wrigley field is MILF paradise
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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