Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
His nipple licking is glorious
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