We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize