Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
i believe in u and ur pee
Randomize
