look no pants
I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
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