we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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