Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
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