I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
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