I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
I just found puke in my bra..
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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