this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
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