New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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