Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
