you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
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