She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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