They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
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