Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
