Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
Randomize