i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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