you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Randomize
