Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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