There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
In America we eat man semen.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
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Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
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