..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
Randomize
