she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
