During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize