Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Randomize
