dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
