the new term for farting is butt boxing.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
