Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.