Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (805): bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad... http://tfl.nu/qw8q
  Replies (45) Good night (3148) Bad night (489)
• Favorite

  (708): View more from Illinois

  We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."

  (1-708): View more from Illinois

  Let's do it. All homo

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (708): We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks." (1-708): Let's do it. All homo http://tfl.nu/evdg
  Replies (30) Good night (4379) Bad night (638)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (614): Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers http://tfl.nu/1ki8
  Replies (29) Good night (759) Bad night (10153)
• Favorite

  (937): View more from Ohio

  There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (937): There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich. http://tfl.nu/hmr5
  Replies (28) Good night (16536) Bad night (1345)
• Favorite

  (916): View more from California

  We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (916): We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever. http://tfl.nu/dui8
  Replies (12) Good night (3970) Bad night (1205)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (585): I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys. http://tfl.nu/354b
  Replies (19) Good night (5372) Bad night (1739)
• Favorite

  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks

  (1403): View more from

  That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (403): Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks (1403): That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills http://tfl.nu/uobi
  Replies (2) Good night (1315) Bad night (522)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (503): I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot... http://tfl.nu/6eyj
  Replies (14) Good night (561) Bad night (1387)
• Favorite

  (705): View more from Ontario

  Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (705): Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work. http://tfl.nu/y66t
  Replies (21) Good night (664) Bad night (1914)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (805): Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012. http://tfl.nu/u0sr
  Replies (3) Good night (1195) Bad night (634)
• Favorite

  (408): View more from California

  i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (408): i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track http://tfl.nu/rp6g
  Replies (8) Good night (602) Bad night (1136)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (816): Wait. Wine + Crossbow..? http://tfl.nu/8knj
  Replies (6) Good night (961) Bad night (542)
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (817): You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres. http://tfl.nu/or4y
  Replies (3) Good night (1685) Bad night (298)
• Favorite

  (415): View more from California

  Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (415): Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring. http://tfl.nu/atx5
  Replies (1) Good night (413) Bad night (326)
• Favorite

  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (262): Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle. http://tfl.nu/lpt1
  Replies (3) Good night (459) Bad night (239)

Randomize