I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
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