32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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