marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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