the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Randomize
