Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
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