Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
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She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
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You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
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