the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
