I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
Randomize
