i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
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