I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Randomize