think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
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I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
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he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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