K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
Randomize
