Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
